Last post. Weirdest feeling ever. Or
actually, the last couple of weeks have been a big weird thing. But the
fact that it’s the last post is another way of closing it all up. Just such
little things like changing my sim card in my phone to my Swedish card was a
little way of letting go. It’s weird how such little things can “mean” so much…
Tuesday during the day we mostly just
packed and stuff. For lunch we ate super good Panini's. I also got some amazing gifts from Alisa. One of them was a
necklace, made out of a quarter. And its split in half, and she has the other
half. It has the sign for “I love you” in sign language. So cute. So that’s
pretty much when my tears started coming.
Then in the afternoon we had to run some errands, which included buying me a third suitcase… hahah. At 5 that we had micro soccer, last practice for me. But it was a good practice. After that we headed home to get ready for my going away party. And it was a great party!! Good food, good people, badminton, campfire, music, dancing, etc. Super good. But of course there were also a lot of goodbyes. Or… not goodbyes! “See you later!” I cried a little, but handled it better than I thought. Up to that point I honestly hadn’t cried for any goodbyes… because I don’t think I realized it, and I think I tried to deny it.
And this evening I was actually truly more happy than sad, which was such a good feeling.
Then in the afternoon we had to run some errands, which included buying me a third suitcase… hahah. At 5 that we had micro soccer, last practice for me. But it was a good practice. After that we headed home to get ready for my going away party. And it was a great party!! Good food, good people, badminton, campfire, music, dancing, etc. Super good. But of course there were also a lot of goodbyes. Or… not goodbyes! “See you later!” I cried a little, but handled it better than I thought. Up to that point I honestly hadn’t cried for any goodbyes… because I don’t think I realized it, and I think I tried to deny it.
And this evening I was actually truly more happy than sad, which was such a good feeling.
When everyone had gone home Lydia &
Alisa gave me the best gift of all times. They gave me a book, filled with
pictures and “letters” from different friends. Seriously, best gift ever. Of course I cried a little again. But thank you sooooo much to everyone
that helped out with the book. Such a nice idea. After looking through the book a
couple of times we packed the rest of my stuff. Well… Lydia did, hah, she
didn’t let us help. Why does it always end up this way for me?! Lydia in
America and Lejla in Sweden haha! L&L power?! We stayed up a little too
long, and all slept in my bed. Nice and cozy haha!
Waking up Wednesday sucked. Cause I really
didn’t want to get out of bed. So weird feeling. But it’s not like I had a
choice. So I got up, took a shower, ate breakfast and packed the very last
things. Then the real goodbyes started, and that’s when it really hit me. That
I was really leaving now. So I had to hug Erika and my extramom for the last
time in a long time, which wasn’t fun at all. But Alisa and Lydia did their
best to cheer me up in the car, and played my favorite Spanish music haha! So
some dancing and singing made us all feel a little better.
When we came to the twin cities we got some things done for Alisa’s exchange year in Spain. Then we went to one of my favorite restaurants, and we ate amaaaaazing food. Soooo good! We were a little too full afterwards haha. After that we walked around a little, and then went to drink some good coffee. Then… off to the airport. We were all feeling a little sad, but a fun thing happened on the way there… my foreign friends called me and told me that they were on the way to the airport to meet me to say goodbye! Omg, if you would know how loved I felt at that moment hah, of course there were some happy tears.
When we came to the twin cities we got some things done for Alisa’s exchange year in Spain. Then we went to one of my favorite restaurants, and we ate amaaaaazing food. Soooo good! We were a little too full afterwards haha. After that we walked around a little, and then went to drink some good coffee. Then… off to the airport. We were all feeling a little sad, but a fun thing happened on the way there… my foreign friends called me and told me that they were on the way to the airport to meet me to say goodbye! Omg, if you would know how loved I felt at that moment hah, of course there were some happy tears.
At the airport we weighed my bags. And
they could weigh 50 pounds… Suitcase 1: 49,5. Suitcase 2: 50,0. Suitcase
3:53,5. Hahah, so I had to move a book, a jeans jacket, and 1 shoe out of the
third one, and then I was down to 50 on the third one too haha! Good job
Emilia!
When we were done we sat down and waited for my friends, who arrived shortly after that! I was sooo happy to see them! But after a little while there was the worst moment of my life. I had to say goodbye to all of them. Jon, Sofia, Milja, Lydia, Alisa and my extradad Eric. (Uhhh I get the worst feeling in my stomach now that I have to write about it…) Alisa, Lydia and I couldn’t stop hugging or crying. It was so damn sad. Worst thing ever. But we had to stop, and I had to stand in line for the security check, which was almost worse! Because I could still see them, but not hug them. And we all cried sooo much. So sad. When I was through the security check we could see each other one last time, which was SO SAAAD. I seriously couldn’t stop crying after that. I just wanted to run back, and not go home. I cried sooo much, I’ve never cried that much! And listen to this; this is how bad it was: I was sitting in the “room” where you wait for the plane. And there was a man sitting across from me. He looked at me a lot, and looked through his bag a couple of times. Then he walked away. After a little while he came back… with Kleenex he’d bought for me! Omg soooooooo cute! Then of course I started crying more cause I thought it was so cute of him HAHA. But yeah, sooo nice. Then I boarded the plane. Once again, weeeeeird feeling. The trip to Chicago only took one hour, but I slept a little bit. I was so exhausted, so I really needed it.
When we were done we sat down and waited for my friends, who arrived shortly after that! I was sooo happy to see them! But after a little while there was the worst moment of my life. I had to say goodbye to all of them. Jon, Sofia, Milja, Lydia, Alisa and my extradad Eric. (Uhhh I get the worst feeling in my stomach now that I have to write about it…) Alisa, Lydia and I couldn’t stop hugging or crying. It was so damn sad. Worst thing ever. But we had to stop, and I had to stand in line for the security check, which was almost worse! Because I could still see them, but not hug them. And we all cried sooo much. So sad. When I was through the security check we could see each other one last time, which was SO SAAAD. I seriously couldn’t stop crying after that. I just wanted to run back, and not go home. I cried sooo much, I’ve never cried that much! And listen to this; this is how bad it was: I was sitting in the “room” where you wait for the plane. And there was a man sitting across from me. He looked at me a lot, and looked through his bag a couple of times. Then he walked away. After a little while he came back… with Kleenex he’d bought for me! Omg soooooooo cute! Then of course I started crying more cause I thought it was so cute of him HAHA. But yeah, sooo nice. Then I boarded the plane. Once again, weeeeeird feeling. The trip to Chicago only took one hour, but I slept a little bit. I was so exhausted, so I really needed it.
When I was at Chicago’s airport I was
running around for like an hour trying to find my terminal and gate haha, it
was sooo hard. It’s just way too big! But I finally found it and sat down to
charge my phone. I had 4 hours layover there, so there wasn’t too much to do.
It really hit me again, so once again I couldn’t stop crying for like an hour.
Yuckkkkk. But then I FINALLY calmed down and ate a little. Then the 4 hours
were over and I could board the plane! I saw a Swedish newspaper and got to
speak Swedish again, which was super weird! I had to switch seats twice; one
time on the ground and one time up in the air. Cause some couples asked me if I
would mind switching with them. So I switched with them hehe.
I managed to sleep a little on the plane, but I feel like I was half awake but still asleep during the whole trip hah. After little more than 8 hours I finally arrived. I had to wait a little while for my suitcases, but I got them, and managed to put all of them on the cart hah. I felt a little proud ;) then I walked out… and saw my family, Lisa & Nienke. And I just stopped in the middle of the aisle and started crying again. Hah, sooooo many feelings at once. I then walked as fast as I could with all of the suitcases and hugged them like I hadn’t seen them in sooo long (hahah irony). It was such a weird feeling, once again. Cause I felt so sad, but so happy. I think a little reason for why I started crying again was because then I’d been on my own crying, for so long. And I really just needed someone to hug me! But then there were also a lot of happy tears. Such a nice feeling to hug all of them again.
I managed to sleep a little on the plane, but I feel like I was half awake but still asleep during the whole trip hah. After little more than 8 hours I finally arrived. I had to wait a little while for my suitcases, but I got them, and managed to put all of them on the cart hah. I felt a little proud ;) then I walked out… and saw my family, Lisa & Nienke. And I just stopped in the middle of the aisle and started crying again. Hah, sooooo many feelings at once. I then walked as fast as I could with all of the suitcases and hugged them like I hadn’t seen them in sooo long (hahah irony). It was such a weird feeling, once again. Cause I felt so sad, but so happy. I think a little reason for why I started crying again was because then I’d been on my own crying, for so long. And I really just needed someone to hug me! But then there were also a lot of happy tears. Such a nice feeling to hug all of them again.
Coming home has been very weird. There are
honestly no words to explain it! But I’m gonna try my best. Happiness mixed
with fear and sadness.
Happiness, because I get to see everyone again, and because I’m home! Also because I had such a nice welcome home, and welcome home/midsummer party.
Sadness, because my year is over. I worked so hard to even make it work, and now it’s over. And it was the best year of my life. I found some of my very best friends on earth. And that is so amazing, but so sad, because I miss them so very much. They helped me find who I truly am. They taught me soooo many things! I’m gonna miss them and a lot of other people (like my host families), sooo much.
Fear, because I’m afraid I’m not gonna keep being the new Emilia. I’m afraid that I’m gonna fall back into how I used to be. But I think that I just have to give it time.
Happiness, because I get to see everyone again, and because I’m home! Also because I had such a nice welcome home, and welcome home/midsummer party.
Sadness, because my year is over. I worked so hard to even make it work, and now it’s over. And it was the best year of my life. I found some of my very best friends on earth. And that is so amazing, but so sad, because I miss them so very much. They helped me find who I truly am. They taught me soooo many things! I’m gonna miss them and a lot of other people (like my host families), sooo much.
Fear, because I’m afraid I’m not gonna keep being the new Emilia. I’m afraid that I’m gonna fall back into how I used to be. But I think that I just have to give it time.
As I said, coming home has been super
weird. Fun, but scary and weird. I’ve kinda in some ways been “hiding” from
people. I haven’t really wanted to meet a lot of people. Which I think is
because I’ve needed my time to take it all in or something like that. I don’t
really know. It’s just so weird. And it’s also a reversed culture shock. Yeah,
it’s been a very different experience. But I’ve started to feel a little better
about it. I’m just gonna have to give it time!
Seeing everything again after almost a year was such a cool feeling! I almost kinda got butterflies in my stomach haha.
Seeing everything again after almost a year was such a cool feeling! I almost kinda got butterflies in my stomach haha.
Going on exchange is something I wish everyone would have the opportunity to do. Because it’s the most amazing thing I can think of. It’s the best thing that has ever happened to me. I changed a lot already in 1st grade of high school in Sweden. But this year totally changed me, which is such an incredible thing! THANK YOU to everyone who made this possible, and helped me make this into such a great year.
I’ve gone through both hard, and amazing times. But I did it! It wasn’t easy, but heck yeah, I did it! I now know, that NOTHING is impossible. I can’t believe how much I’ve changed, and I’m so happy about it. Without my exchange, I wouldn’t be the person I am today.
It’s sad to think that this is my last
post here. But now I’m off to new adventures! "All endings are
also beginnings. We just don't know it yet."
Thank you once again to everyone that helped me. I’m gonna be thankful for the rest of my life. And to my dearest friends and extra families, I love you, sooo much! And I’ll be back.
Thank you once again to everyone that helped me. I’m gonna be thankful for the rest of my life. And to my dearest friends and extra families, I love you, sooo much! And I’ll be back.
Sunrise
Hiking with Danny
TWINS GAME
HAHA "STICK THE BUTT OUT"
MISS MY LOVELY HAWAIIAN FRIENDS SO MUCH
My beautiful friends. I miss you
